Viva Las Vegas!

There are times in your life that you consider to be your one in a life time experiences. For me, it was meeting Josh, our wedding day, and I know..in a few years, it will be the birth of our first child. Along with those "normal" experiences, I can also add the five day trip to Vegas!

First thing you must all know is that Josh doesn't gamble. Since we have been married I have only been able to get him into one or two casino, and that was to only do penny slots! I don't gamble much either, but I am no where near as bad as Josh. He hates it. Along with not gambling, we have also slowed down on drinking..weird right?! We were the party house in Sicily! But since being diagnosed, we have to watch him, which means I watch myself to make sure I can still take care of him if needed. We rarely drink. We rarely gamble. All of this is funny because we just spent five days in Vegas! 

We received the phone call a few months ago from Josh's Neuro Oncologist nurse case manager. She had zero details. No idea what we were doing and no idea where we were staying, all she knew was that it was an all expense paid trip to Vegas. Most people would have passed, but Josh and I signed right up. We have been talking about going out west since moving back because Josh has never been past Texas, haha. We were literally the first people on the list. Besides our parents and a select few, no one knew we were going. I do this for two reasons. One, I don't know if in a few months Josh will be able to do it so I don't make a big deal about it. We try to not plan in advance, so I keep everything on the down low in case Josh can't go. It's easier to not have to explain than have a million people asking what happen. The other reason I don't talk about it is to surprise people. If I just say "oh on Friday we will be doing such and such" then people can give us an honest response.."oh wow, I'm so happy for you guys." If I talk about it constantly, people tend to get annoyed..you know? So yes, we knew months in advance and just kept it to ourselves. 

We had to go to a meeting a week before our trip to get the run down of everything. First off, I must state this trip was COMPLETLEY free. I'm not saying flight was free and we had to pay for food, or that the food was free but we had to pay for the hotel..no. This entire trip was free. I think in the beginning there was a total of 140 of us on the trip..I know towards the end that number had grown though. The flight, the hotel, the food, the entertainment. all of the trips and adventures we did, was free. The whole trip was put together by the USO. Along with them, they also had American Airlines that donated the plane. Yes, we flew on a chartered plane with only the people on the trip on it! As well as many supporters that donated money, time, and effort to make sure we had a memorable trip. 

Friday morning we met at the USO to get chartered by a bus to Reagan airport. Once we were there, we were introduced to the welcome that we would become so accustomed to. There were people standing outside, with signs clapping and yelling for us. It was overwhelming! Once we were checked in, we received a TSA escort to security where we experienced THE FASTEST security check! I was floored, lol. We walked to our gate where they had a band playing, food and refreshments, and more people thanking us for our service. After a few speeches, we then boarded the plane where Josh and I had the whole row to ourselves! I was so excited! Josh didn't sleep much the night before and since it was going to be a long flight, he was able to stretch out and catch some z's.

Before flying out, we received a salute from the Airports fire department! This is usually used for diplomats and very important people, so now we are apart of the few that have received a water salute. It happened when we landed in Vegas as well. 

(I stole this picture because obviously I was on that plane!)

    

The first night was a fancy night so we downed our fanciest attire! I actually wore a dress...something I probably haven't done since my wedding day! Josh actually wore a tie, one that he tied all by himself..that's how fancy you know it was! It was basically a night for all the donors to get together and welcome us to Vegas. We had an amazing dinner and I was even able to drink a little, yay! It went on a little longer than I wanted. With being jetlagged and the time difference I was exhauted. Most people went out after and partied it up.. Josh and I went back to the room and had club Hearndon which consisted of a shower, a snack, and sleeeeeep! 

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Saturday:

The next morning, we ate breakfast and headed out to our tour of the Shark Reef at Mandalay Bay. We had some time to kill before boarding on the bus so I asked (more like told) Josh if he wanted to gamble a little. He said he had to, he was in Vegas after all! We put in $20 and split it between us both. He put $10 in his machine...played literally 5 minutes and won 90freaking dollars! I was absolutely floored (and kind of annoyed, lol). He decided to test his luck and decided to play until he hit $60. That was his limit, he was going to cash out if he didn't win by then. It was almost down to $60 when he hit it big again! He ended up cashing out with $85. Meanwhile I was losing everything. Grand totally I lost about $30 the whole trip (we only played penny slots, so I wasn't to bummed). Josh still has some money left over from his big winnings. I want to call it beginners luck...but maybe that's just me being bitter lol.

We then loaded up onto the bus and headed to Mandalay Bay where we went to a Shark Reef. Being aquarium nerds, we loved this! Afterwards, we went to the Siegfried and Roy Tiger exhibit and they also had dolphins. We then decided to walk around a little while waiting for our bus. I honestly love just to walk around the hotels, each one of them is so unique with their own atmosphere and restaurants. It nice to just walk and appreciate the beauty of it all. 

Dinner that night was at Bubba Gumps and it was amazing! We were able to meet Gary Sinise, who played Lieutenant Dan in Forrest Gump. He is a HUGE supporter of the troops. He has his own foundation, The Gary Sinise Foundation that does amazing things. It was so surreal meeting Lieutenant Dan, at Bubba Gumps, surrounded by movie movie memorabilia. It was truly amazing and Gary is really a nice guy. Josh and I were nervous to ask him to sign the hat because we had already met him in the line when we first arrived. But he made his way around to every single table and I'm almost certain he didn't want to leave the restaurant until he had met everyone there. He took time to talk to us and to take pictures. 

 


I'm not entirely certain, but I think they had shut down the restaurant for us. There may have been a first floor but I know we had the entire second floor to ourselves. They had set up menus for us, which contained SO. MUCH. FOOD! They also kept pushing alcohol onto us, so we happily accepted. I will say, Josh and I got really buzzed that night and I even woke up with a hang over! Honestly (mom) we only drank two or three drinks, I have no idea when we became such light weights, lol. We then were bused off to old Vegas at the Golden Nugget where we watched Gary and The Lt. Dan Band play a free concert on Freemont Street. It was amazing but SO cold. Josh and I really didn't plan on it being cold, it's Vegas which is in a desert..so we didn't pack a lot of winter type clothes. That night, we froze our butts off. By the end of the night I swear my toes were ice cubes!

 

Octob...HOCKEY SEASON!

I love fall time, but what I love more is the start of hockey season! We started off October with Chemotherapy. Josh did SO great that we actually forgot he was on it, oops! Aside from the normal fatigue, he made it through like a champ. Because of this, I figured I would treat him with hockey tickets. Our first game of the season was a total bust, we lost 0-5. Because of this, we decided what the hell and splurged on tickets for the next game, which was won! Lucky for our bank account, the team went up north to play three games in Canada so we are on a "game break." Along with the tickets, we splurged (and I mean, realllllly splurged) and bought two jerseys of our favorite players. I was completely in love with how excited Josh was. Seeing that made all the money spending a little less important. Money will always be there. It will always replenish itself one way or another. The memories however, will last a life time. I will go out of my way to just put a smile on his face. For in that moment, he is not a cancer patient, he is just Josh. A guy who loves his country, love his wife, and loves hockey!

Josh also had his 3 month check up MRI. He does two MRIs, one with contrast and one without. He has done so many of them, we have lost count. However, Josh did ask his oncologist for a slideshow of all the MRIs he has had, which I thought was a cool idea to see how things have changed. Speaking of change, the doctors have seen some in Josh's tumor. It's not dramatic, but basically Josh is responding well to treatment. The MRIs have shown improvement since moving here. Tumor is stable, not growing yet not shrinking. For now, we are doing great. He will never say he is a survivor, but stable is just as great. As long as it is maintained and hasn't grown, that is music to my ears. His blood work came back normal. Because of all the traveling we are doing for November, he was cleared to start Chemo the last week of October.

This month, we also had the pleasure of speaking on the panel at the Warrior Symposium for Navy Safe Harbor. I am forever grateful for this organization. They were the first people we met when we landed in Maryland. They were with us every step of the way the first few months. They sat with me during Josh's brain surgery, they help file paper work for my parents travel expenses, they took care of everything when dealing with Josh's old command and checking into his new command..basically they took care of everything. We have developed a friendship with our non-medical care team, a Master Chief who get's along perfectly with Josh and I. He has always helped us and stuck up for us when needed. We actually spoke on the panel as a favor to him. They asked us the general questions, what was his diagnosis, how has it changed our lives, and anything they could improve on. We are so thankful that we were placed in this organization, it has definitely helped us in time of need. We had nothing but good things to say on the panel. An added plus was I got to see my sexy Sailor in uniform, hubba hubba!

Wrapping up my October post...Halloween! Since Josh was on chemo, I wanted a simple costume for him. Out of the blue he said he wanted to be Waldo. Lucky for us, Target had his shirt. I toyed around for a little while on what I wanted to be, but at the Halloween store I found out they actually make the female version of Waldo, Wenda haha. So I bought the costume and tah-da, Waldo and Wenda was born! I really didn't think people would know who we were, I didn't think Wheres Waldo was as popular as it was when we were kids. But there were many adults who loved our costumes and one little boy said, with the biggest smile on his face, "Where's Waldo is my favorite book!" Success! We went to my brothers house to celebrate because trick or treaters were so minimal last year. It was a ton of fun handing out candy and seeing all of the costumes.

While I am sad to see October go, I am SO excited for Novemeber! It's going to be filled with tons of traveling and making ever last memories!

Loving every minute

Looking at my calendar I realized that October is almost over and I still haven't updated on September! A few weekends ago, I worked on the blog itself. I spent the day trying to figure out why my pictures were not showing up. After a little bit of research and me literally sitting down all day fixing all the posts, I am happy to see the pictures finally showing up! So..here is my update on September...half way though October..I swear, I will get this blog on schedule once again!

For the first time in a few months, Josh was able to start chemo on his schedule time. His blood work came back good, so no delays this month. He took his chemotherapy like a champ. Nine sessions in and I am still in awe on how well he handles it. He powers through the fatigue. He forces himself to eat, even when he doesn't want to. He treats the nausea like a seasoned veteran. I try to make chemo week easy for him, we limit activities and I make sure his schedule is clear for the week. 

September offered us the start of football season! Now, I am an avid sports fan. I don't know player statistics and I don't care to know everything about sports, but I do have my few teams I follow and I do know enough to get through a game. My lovely husband however, could care less about sports. He will watch the game and luckily he does know what's going on, but getting him to go to a game is a struggle. (unless it's hockey, then he will actually buy the tickets himself, lol) Since we live on base, and since people are so generous to Wounded Warriors, we often get tickets offered to us. We have to act fast and sign up, but since it's a small group, we usually get tickets to what we want to do. This year, I made it my goal to take Josh to a professional football game. I didn't care who was playing, I just wanted him to experience it. (plus, we hit all the other pro teams..baseball, hockey, basketball..might as well hit football while we can) Lucky for us, they had tickets to the first game of the season, Redskins vs Dolphins! I was so excited and was happy to see Josh was to. We received tickets for a suite. Perfect view of the game and even though they lost, we still loved every second of it! I actually signed us up for the game the following week which was the Redskins vs Rams. We won that game!

*Disclaimer, For anyone who is tired of seeing us doing totally freaking awesome things, please feel free to unfriend me on Facebook. I have heard a few times "wow, I'm so jealous...you are so lucky!" No. We are not. We are getting free tickets and cool opportunities because my husband has cancer. In no way shape or form are we posting things to brag or to throw it into peoples faces. Yes, we get free suite tickets to sporting events. Yes, we get to meet awesome people and celebrities. But at the price of my husband going through treatment for cancer. I would give it all back if it meant my husband wasn't in this situation. But since we are, we are living our life and getting perks along the way. So, like I said, if that annoys anyone or if you're tired of us having so much fun, please unfriend me. Plus, you won't like whats coming in November...how dare we have fun!* 

What else happened in September....OH! Josh celebrated his 1 year of being smoke free! I read a few blogs that said you shouldn't celebrate being smoke free. I'm not entirely sure why, but it was mainly because it's a day to day battle to not smoke...well so is every other addiction so I decided to do what I want. We celebrated by going to Georgetown Cupcakes in Bethesda! I ended up buying half a dozen and still had to share some with my brother and his family. So. Many. Cupcakes. But I know he loved it. It was something to celebrate. The kid that swore he would never quit smoking, did. Not saying the year was easy for him, but he essentially quit cold turkey and I am so proud that he didn't go back. His smoking was always a problem for us as I am allergic to it. Before we got married, I would get sick every time I was around him. When we moved in together, I got used to it but I hated the way he smelled and how badly our car smelled. Now, I love walking up to him and giving him a hug and not feeling like I was standing in a smoke cloud. I love that I don't have to frequently wash his jackets and his clothes always smell like detergent. It's so nice! I'm sure Josh would have a cigarette right now if it was offered to him, and I'm sure that's something that will always be with him. But I am proud of the will power he has developed to quit and stay smoke free. 

Lastly, we met up with my brother and his family to do a little trip out to Luray Caverns. I love having family so close that we can do things together on the weekend. Since moving here, I had wanted to go out to the caverns (as they show commercials for it on TV all the time) but we never had a push to go. My brother, sister in law and niece met us out there and we walked the caverns. It was absolutely beautiful. I loved how they grew and more importantly, I loved how excited Josh was over it. I had my own personal guide with me, he taught me everything he knew about it, which was a lot, haha. 

September offered us a lot of memories, but I am also super excited for what the next couple months hold for us. For one, Josh and I are going to speak on a panel at the end of the month. We were offered to talk about getting off of base and doing things at the Navy Safe Harbor Warrior symposium. We have two trips planned in November, one I can't talk about right now and the other is to go home for Thanksgiving! After that, we will be back up in Maryland for a week of Chemo and then a few days before we fly back to Florida for our two week Christmas vacation. Busy busy, but loving every minute of it!

Looking Back...

The month of September never held any significant value to me. Aside from the few birthdays celebrated in this month, I never really paid much attention to it. I looked forward to it as it eased into my favorite season, fall. But now September holds value. It signifies life changes, struggle, love, hatred, and celebration all in one month.It's been one year since we moved to Maryland. It's been one year since Josh had brain surgery. It's been one year since Josh quit smoking. It's been one year since Josh was diagnosed.

It's been one year.

I don't think that you should celebrate a diagnosis. The day that forever changed our lives shouldn't be honored. I didn't even realized I missed it until I wrote the date the next day. While I hate that day, it has showed us so much this past year.


It showed me how strong I can be.
It showed me how loved I am.
It showed me how much love I have for him.
It showed me how strong we are.
It showed me to stop worrying about stupid things and to live in the moment.
It showed me that money isn't everything, memories are..so go ahead and blow $300 on hockey tickets...the memories are worth it.
It showed me that despite my weak stomach, I can pack gauze into a golf ball size hole in my husband.
It showed me that chemotherapy is a cold, heartless bitch. It takes a person with so much life and joy, down to nothing.
It shows me that life is worth living.

So yes, we have been through a lot. A lot more than anyone our age should go through. But we are also grateful for this..in some strange way. I am proud of how strong our marriage is. I am in awe of my husbands strength, courage, and commitment to making it through everyday with a smile on his face. Although we have lost some friends on this journey, I am glad for everyone who has stuck around and for those who call or text me to check in on things. To our families, thank you. We wouldn't have made it through this year without the constant cheering and supporting.

A lot of things are changing within the next year or so. I know from our past year that we can handle anything life throws at us. I won't say bring it, because to me that seems like you're just asking for it. But I know deep down that, whatever happens, we are prepared. We will make it through this.

A Little More

I am trying more to be committed to doing this. I don't want to force myself to write, it isn't a job. It's not as if people are waiting on the edge of their seats to see what I will post next. I never wanted to make this something I dread doing. I love writing. I love allowing people to see into our world. So if I don't post for awhile, it usually means one of two things. One being that what ever is happening doesn't seem note worthy. Or, that I really just don't want to write. I have noticed in the past few weeks that Josh and I often go through a roller coaster of emotions. There are days, weeks, or even months when we are the active, fun, easy going couple that is down for anything. Then there are a days when we want nothing more than to just shut the world out and spend days in our apartment. I know it's not healthy, which is why by the third or fourth day I force ourselves to go out and do something. This month it seems to be our down month. We have locked ourselves in the apartment more often than usual, but we did bust out for a few things. I think cancer aside, we often get to busy with our lives that we forget about the little things. There are some days when we do nothing more than lay in bed together and just hold each other. There are times when we binge watch an entire show in a week, only going out for food or appointments. Yes, to some people that isn't healthy. But for us it works because we have never been able to do just that. To just sit in silence. To just hold each other. To just make our own little nest of blankets and pillows in bed and watch an entire season of our favorite show. It's nice that we have the ability to do it now, so for now, I'm allowing it. I'm appreciating it.


First off, Chemo was delayed a week by our doing. I have been overwhelmed with keeping everything straight I delayed Chemo without knowing it. In my defense, no one from his oncology team called to tell us this so we just rolled with it. There is room to wiggle when it comes to chemo. The rule is that he is off for four weeks before starting the new cycle. Since we have delayed so many times, I can honestly say I have no idea what the original track for chemo is, haha. But we were okay with the delay, it offered me a week of seeing my old husband, which was nice. Chemotherapy has become so routine for us. We have it down to a science though Josh likes to push the limits every now and again, lol. We, once again, decided to go to a concert in the middle of chemo. I swear I try to plan around it, but for some reason it always lands that way. Anyways, we went to see Machine Gun Kelly while Josh was on chemotherapy! Concert was amazing, as I thought it would be. Being that we only go see rock concerts, it was a different atmosphere at a rap concert. However, it was hands down the second best concert I have ever been to! Josh didn't get hit on this time (last two concert he had) but he did get asked if he had any "coke...or like any other drugs.." I told him he should have told her he was an undercover cop, that would have made for a good night, haha. My husband, who was wearing a Batman shirt and dad shorts was assumed to be a drug dealer! The only good thing he had on him was chemotherapy and if she wanted that, she was either desperate or stupid.

Another high light from August was that Josh celebrated his 9 year anniversary in the Navy! Many people don't know the story behind Josh joining...well here it goes! At 19 years old, Josh was eager to get out of our hometown (like most people) and was willing to do anything. I remember him telling me he was going to join the Marines because and I quote "they were the most likely to take him." Now, my memory is fuzzy, but I can recall a huge fight over this. Keep in mind I was only 17, young and in love. Luckily his dad stopped him from joining, but still determined to leave, he decided on joining the Navy instead. In our minds, we were convinced he would never have to go to the desert being on a ship and all. Boy were we wrong about that! But anyways, back to the story. I can remember him riding his bike over to my house to tell me that he had enlisted into the Navy. I was furious, and I think, being 17 young and stupid that we actually broke up over this. He never told me that he was going to join. Memory is hazy, and yes, he will probably deny this but I can't remember us discussing this. Our first year in the Navy was as bumpy as can be. We broke up so many times, I missed his boot camp graduation, we dated other people. But, ultimately we got back together and became the couple we are today. He never ended up on a ship, but the time he has spent in the Navy has made me extremely proud of him and all that he has accomplished. We have grown over the past nine years, individually and together. Nine years...three deployments, countless training, three duty stations later and now they are saving his life.

**Also, happy 11 months smoke free! I'm super proud of that too!**

Last August highlight was our Nationals game! As Josh is a wounded warrior, we are often offered to do so many different things. This time we signed up to get free tickets to a Nationals game. Both of us grew up going to baseball games, so it was another professional sporting event to check off of our list. We not only got free tickets, but they were suite tickets, score! We were able to go to the Presidents Club, which is for the elite, where it was a buffet of all different types of food. Once lunch was over, we were to go to our seats that were located RIGHT BEHIND HOME PLATE. Holy smokes, we were so close we could hear the players talking! However, being behind home plate, the ball tends to come in your direction more often than I thought. Luckily there was a huge net in front of us, but that didn't stop us from flinching every time the ball came in our direction, lol. It was a great way to spend Sunday afternoon

July...

I haven't posted in a very long time. I would say it's writers block but as I am not a writer nor am I mentally blocked, I really have no excuse. Instead I would go with the fact that I really have nothing to write about. Day in and day out my life revolves around this disease. There are moments, days even, when I want nothing more than to think about something else. That, however, is not my reality. My life revolves around medication, doctor visits, puke patrol, chemotherapy, and making my husband's life as easy as possible. I am trying to change content of this blog, add more happy stories, talk about our trips, and try to not make the disease my main focus. But everything in my life reverts back to cancer. Every month we do chemotherapy. Every month my husband has been making it through it with flying colors, only dealing with minor moments of nausea. I try to reinvent every blog every post, to make it interesting and to add humor as much as possible. More often than not it's hard for me to put our month into words. Sometimes it's a great month, sometimes it's a very boring normal month. I try to make it as interesting as I can, to trying new things and change it up. But the bottom line is that this blog is for myself. I created it with the sole intention of updating people on our lives and for giving myself an outlet to deal with the life I have been given. I shared this with Josh, who in his ever supporting manner told me that I shouldn't worry about keeping people interested. I shouldn't care if one person reads this or if twenty people read this. It's about keeping myself centered and for allowing people into our lives. With that being said, I will update all on our lives!

June 14th was my last update and as it is almost the end of July, I have one word to say- yikes!

July 4th was spent at the White House. Yes, we had the most American Fourth, haha. Because Josh is a wounded warrior, we were invited to attend a barbecue and fire works. The actual day kind of sucked, it rained all morning so I knew no matter what was going to happen, the ground itself was going to be muddy. I was no where near prepared for how muddy it actually was, but that's not as interesting as the actual visit itself, lol. Since it rained all morning, they canceled the barbecue which was a real bummer. We arrived about an hour late due to traffic and issues beyond our control. The White House really did have a nice set up. The event was sponsored by the USO so they had face painting booths for the kids, a photo booth and a concert stage. We really didn't know about anything that was going on prior to the event. We actually got to see Bruno Mars perform, neither one of us are fans but he actually puts on a really good show. He is definitely one of those artists that sounds exactly the same on an album vs. in real life. We were also then told that the President had not made appearances in the past years so it was doubtful he would be making it this year. Well, after Bruno preformed, he introduced the President and First Lady! Regardless of how you feel about him, how many you can say they were standing in the same room as the President?! After his speech, they started the fire works. Though our fourth wasn't the perfect day, plans changed and by the end of the day both of us were annoyed with everything, looking back on it now, it was a great day. I love being so close to DC that we are able to experience these things. Josh being a Wounded Warrior definitely opens a lot of doors for us and allows us to meet extraordinary people and do amazing things. I am grateful for this.

It seems as if our month of July was incredibly busy and incredibly chill at the same time. I feel like we did so much, but at the same time we had a lot of down time. Aside from Chemo, we rarely had any appointments. This of course makes us stir crazy, so to fill the time, we took a random trip down to Norfolk. Spontaneous trips have become our new norm. As crazy as it sounds, I don't worry about money. If there is something we want to do, somewhere we want to go to, something we want to see, we do it. It was a Thursday when I found out there was a Norfolk Aquarium. We packed the car up Saturday and spent the weekend down there. Never in my life have I have been this spontaneous but I figure aside from making our appointments and keeping his health in check, this is the third most important thing, experiencing life. So we spent the weekend in Norfolk, catching up with one of our best friends, and then going to the aquarium. It was actually a cute little aquarium and since we were there when it first opened in the morning, we were able to go through all exhibits and see the animals active.   

And last, but not least my parents came to visit! My brother moved to Virginia for work so my mom tagged along with them then half way through the week my Dad arrived. It was nice to have them both here, it was nice getting a break from life. 

Birthday...Surgery..and everything in between

 We try, very hard actually, to keep our lives private. We have never been ones to openly share our life trials and tribulations with everyone. Since Josh's diagnosis though, we have decided to be open with people and to make our lives an open book. If anyone has questions about cancer, we answer them. If anyone has questions about chemotherapy, radiation, how to treat nausea, how to get your patient to eat, the nitty gritty details of our "new normal," we answer them.  I really struggled with this. How much was to much? How would people react to certain things I tell them? Most people, I hope, know us and know the kind of people we are. But, people judge. Every person is different. Every experience is different. There is no manual on how to feel, act, or handle situations. What we do, say, or think is completely different than the next patient. We don't try the new latest and greatest cancer treatments. We stick to what our doctor tells us and go about our business. We try everyday to make the right decisions for ourselves and each other. I try to paint a picture of what we are going through. To not sugar coat things and to really tell how it is. I try to make people aware of the different things we go through on a daily basis. But in this forth coming way, I still try to keep private things, well, private.  So I struggle and I don't over share, I only give the bare minimum. If people ask, I will tell, but otherwise I keep it to myself. My husband however, is a walking open book. Nothing is off the table with him, especially now more than ever. If any follow me on facebook, you will know that Josh had surgery last Tuesday. I haven't said anything about it and I thank all of you for kindly respecting us by not asking. But, I figured the blog is the best place to lay it all out.

For the past six years Josh has been dealing with pilonidal cyst. If you don't know what it is, and can bare nasty photos, look it up on Google. If not just know that it's basically an abnormal skin growth that contains hair and skin which is located on the tailbone. It is very common with people in the military and those lucky men who are basically as hairy as a gorilla. My husband, is both. He has had five different surgeries over the past six years, the last one being in 2010 while on deployment in Spain. The way to treat it is to cut it and then pack it with a wound vac for a month or so. My husband is a veteran in this, he's done all the surgeries alone, without me there to care for him. I'm glad he's been through it, but it was a little nerve wrecking for me doing it alone with him. About three months ago this lovely cyst decided to show it's ugly head. I was surprised, and annoyed, that along with all the million of other things Josh is dealing with at the moment, this stupid thing decided it was the perfect time to come back. My husband being who he is, has taken this all like a champ. He's been in pain, he's dealt with bleeding, and he's been insanely uncomfortable at times so,  we had to get it dealt with. We showed it to his primary care doctor who then referred us to General Surgery. We had an appointment on June 4th, his surgery was that following Tuesday. We had a small window to get this surgery done. He had to have it done after his last session of chemo and healing up before his next session. In order to do this, they had to act fast and since Josh is on chemotherapy they have to be extra careful as he is a bleed risk. 

Being that we live at a hospital, I have overcome my 
fears of them and I actually was pretty good that day. Josh of course was joking around. He made it through with flying colors. I met him in Post OP where the nurse told me he woke up after anesthesia, looked at her confused and said "You're not my wife!" haha. I brought him home, he popped some pain killers and went to sleep. The next day I was strong, confident and cool in caring for him UNTIL I had to change his dressing. The day prior, the nurse went step by step with me on how to do this and I was good. I could do it without a problem. I always tell myself, I'm all he's got so I have to do it. But this? This was different. This was something I couldn't do. I'll be frank, the wound is nice. They did an amazing job. But, it's literally a hole in him. I couldn't get over that. Teaching in the past years I have been thrown up on, pee'd on, and pooped on, but this? No way. I have a brand new respect for anyone that has to take care of these things...and the medical field in general. So we walked to the hospital, desperate for someone to pack his wound. We went to General Surgery and Josh was able to get a temporary wound vac attached to him. No more packing changes for me! YAY! So he's had a temporary vac since Wednesday. He had it changed out on Friday, but we are still waiting for the more permanent one to come. This surgery has been very well. Josh is in minimal pain, though it is hard for him to walk long periods of time and to comfortably sit down. Fingers crossed, this surgery is going to last him a while and silly 'ole cyst stays away!

Well...what else happened this month...hmm...OH! My lovely husband turned 28! We have drastically changed since last year. I remember bits and pieces of his party as we both were incredibly intoxicated. We had spent the day at the beach and then threw at party with around 20 people at our house later that night. We were always known as the "party house." People were constantly at our house and we were known for always having a good time. This year however, was different. Neither one of us had a drink. We didn't have a wild party. Instead we went to Gettysburg. Pennsylvania and drove around learning about the civil war! So wild, haha. It was nice though. It was rainy and cold, but we were determined to have a good time. We were able to drive around and do an audio tour which allowed us to get out and take pictures when we wanted. Josh was able to experience it all without getting completely exhausted from it. So it was educational and some might say it was a boring way to spend your 28th birthday but he loved it. He loves history and is a very good (and patient) teacher on telling me random facts and stories from the war. After driving around Gettysburg park (the tour was supposed to be 90 minutes...ours went on for about 4 hours!) we decided to try local restaurant and then end the day with some ice cream from Dairy Queen. Driving home we reflected on our day, comparing it to the days in the past where we would have planned this elaborate party and drink until we were extremely drunk. This year, it was different. Dare I say, we have grown up?! We still love to have fun. We still love to have people over, play games, and drink. But driving home that day, my husband looked over at me and said "Thank you, I had the best day" made all those partying days a distant memory.